Here we are...Mother's Day. As my one gf put it, it's just another ole day - laundry, dishes, cleaning, etc. Still have to do the same old routine. :o)
But, naturally, I have some thoughts on Mother's Day...my sister forwarded this feature from Harper's Bazaar - 4 chic celebrity moms share their thoughts. Which then made me ponder - What was the best lesson my mother gave me? And, I really had a hard time thinking what that could be. Rather, I think it was all that she did that made me not want to be so much like her. She was such a super woman who did everything. And, everything for her man. So much so that he couldn't lift a finger to do anything for her, let alone anyone else. There was a running joke in our family that my father was the sort of helpless man that if you left him for a weekend and hung a loaf of bread around his neck, he'd still die of starvation because no one lifted the bread to his mouth. Seriously.
I mean, don't get me wrong. My father worked very hard every day to provide us with the best. But my mom...hands down I have not met a woman like her. My mother made full meals every evening (which meant two vegetable dishes, one meat and a soup). Yes, EVERY night and hardly ever leftovers. If there were leftovers, they were added to the new dishes and soup. Can you imagine? I would die. Then she cleaned up all the dishes, then she cut fruit for us and then after we were all taken care of, then she would run off and work. She was a travel agent and an insurance agent so she would make the rounds to all her friends/clients houses to do insurance stuff (sometimes I would tag along) and then in the daytime, she was able to tend to household stuff and travel agent stuff while we were at school. This woman was NO JOKE!
So, I could say that she taught me to be independent and a hard worker, umm, I could say I am something like that but I do like being taken care of. I truly sought a man that was the furthest like my father that I could find. I mean, I do have to thank my mom for being who she was so I could understand that if you give a man an inch, he will take a mile...and then forget to pull his end of the weight. Is my husband reading this? Hi, honey! Looove you!
Okay, second point - I had a very lovely breakfast and pedicure with a good friend of mine, on her request yesterday morning and it turned into a sort of pre-mother's day gift. For me, I had thought, "Oh, she just wants to get together because they are moving and it will be nice that we can chat sans children for once." But while we were out she said, "Y'know, I just wanted us to get together because I thought 'M and G always get to go out together why can't Belinda and I get together just us girls?'"
And then I thought Hey yeah...that is so right. When our husbands get together it is usually one on one without children. They go out at night and we women always just get together with our kids. It's like once the baby comes, they are just an extension of us and they naturally just come with us. Even though our conversation is always compromised and we always have to spell everything out. Sometimes you forget how nice it is to get away and get to speak without whispering or spelling things out. Don't get me wrong. My baby is truly an extension of me. Sometimes, I feel a bit weird when she is not attached at my hip (and then I get over it really quickly). I'm pretty sure all moms feel that way and I guess that's a good thing because if the moms weren't attached then who else would be? That would be sad.
I don't know. I love my child dearly but just the other day, I saw a teenager walking with her dad, getting into the driver's seat of the car and a thought flashed through my mind - "It's going to be at least 10 years until D reaches that point! TEN YEARS of her being totally reliant on us...." I felt a slight pang of panic (and then it disappeared). TEN YEARS!!! And then again, the worry never subsides!!