Just came across this great article via Goop. It is titled, "The Scary Power of Negative Words."
This article is just so powerful. Everyone should read it. Firstly, I am a living example of the effects negative words can have on a person.
All my life I've been told by my mother that I am stupid. No joke. She literally said to me once (probably when I was 8 or 9) something along the lines of "I used to be the most stupid one in the family but now that you're here, you are the most stupid." I am the youngest child. Yeah, thanks mom.
I mean, truly. I went through life afraid of raising my hand in class. In fact, I have only recently begun to actually speak up at meetings after years of thinking things in my head, being too afraid to say them only to have someone else share the same idea I had and receive a great response from our peers. My ideas do matter! I am smart and even if my ideas aren't that great, I don't need to be afraid to share them.
Take my own mother who was called "stupid" by my dad for years. Probably 30 years since that is how long they'd been married. And to this day, even though they have been divorced for over 10 years, my mother is still seeking validation that she is not stupid. She is not!
I cringe when I hear parents make flippant comments like, "Oh, she is just lazy" I do not allow my mother to label my child in any way. EVER.
This article is also another reminder to me of setting intentions - even just by starting with writing down the intention of using kinder words. For a while now the universe has been putting "intention" in my path. I don't know how many different ways this can come at me before I actually start setting intentions. The thing is, setting intentions seems like "goal setting" to me which seems quite daunting. I have never set a goal for myself as I am afraid of failure. I just don't want to go there and life has quite worked out well for me despite not setting goals. I wonder if maybe in my mind I do set short term goals but I just don't ever write them down?
Just think, I could probably achieve a lot more if I'd write my intentions down. For now, it will be helpful to write down the intention to use kinder words and to surround myself with positivity.