Monday, May 26, 2014

Choosing love instead of anger

I'm just going to take my friend's post title and use it!  Here, my friend wrote a beautiful post about choosing love instead of anger.  This post was just what I need as a gentle reminder that I, too wish to choose love instead of anger.  To choose her way instead of mine sometimes.  Or at least recognize what might be going through her mind.

When I hear D say, "You always get to do what you want to do...we always do what you guys want to do."  Well, that makes me feel sad.  It makes me see what her world must seem like to her - off to run an errand with mom.  Oh, it's dinner time, breakfast, lunch and we are eating what mom (or dad) prepares.  Despite all the time we spend trying to come up with things and activities that we think D will enjoy, I think in the grand scheme of things, maybe she just thinks it's what we want to do.

I mean, to be fair, if it were up to D she would be eating egg for breakfast (which she does have every day), mac and cheese for lunch and dinner followed by ice cream after lunch and dinner.  With candy thrown in for snacks throughout the day.  Maybe candy and cheese.

Sometimes, it can seem a bit like a power struggle.  And sometimes, it feels good to give up the power struggle to her.  I'm not saying cave over certain decisions, but when she is upset, to really get down to her level and speak softly instead of letting her anger elevate my own.  Every day it is an evolution.  Mind you, I said evolution, not revolution.

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