Boundaries

Our lovely teacher held a Friday circle last week and the topic was "boundaries." We each have personal boundaries and it's respectful not to cross another's boundaries. It's interesting because apparently, my child shared that people touch her hair all the time and though it bothers her sometimes, it's not enough that she would make a fuss.
She's fine with it. The assistant teacher shared with me that while the teacher usually does not make comments during these sharing circles because it's really a space for the kids to speak and whatever is shared there, stays there, he did make one comment at the end. Here is what he said, "I don't normally comment on things that are shared here, but I feel I need to make a comment here. D, when you said that you tolerated people touching your hair, I disagree. I believe that your hair is an extension of you and if you don't want someone touching your hair, you should absolutely feel in the right to tell them so. People should not be touching your hair without your permission."
Isn't that sweet?

The other day, we went on a hike and a few boys apparently stole a key chain from a girl and then proceeded to lose it. They didn't think anything of it, but the girl was sad. The assistant teacher had a word with all involved and brought up boundaries. What are some of the solutions? Among some mentioned, one of the boys volunteered to give M his keychain as a replacement and she was fine with that. In looking at this situation though, I can't help but think, "What about boundaries? Maybe the boys wouldn't have taken M's keychain to begin with if she had held stricter boundaries."

I feel strongly that girls should not be shrinking wallflowers and they should speak up when something doesn't suit them. If we just address the boys and ask them to rethink their actions, then we aren't necessarily setting our girls up to succeed are we? After all, real life is not actually a playground where teachers settle disputes and fight for you. In the real world, probably most guys aren't going to be willing to hear a girl's side of things. I am all for always reminding girls to be assertive and not relying on others to settle fights for you.